Thursday, August 14, 2008

There is No Cure

My friend stated to me that she felt like giving up. I couldn't believe I was hearing those words coming out of her mouth. Although I was trying to be the best friend that I could be, I knew how she felt. I mean we are in our early and mid twenties, to us we should be on top of the game and not dragging slightly behind.

I felt a brief sadness for us. To have to deal with life. I mean who says that we have to deal with it. Giving up is certainly the easy part and at times I think that all of us want to just throw in the towel and scream Mercy! But there is no cure for sadness, it simply just must go. (I know that that is a mouthful)

Thursday, August 07, 2008

Almost


I had almost forgot. Almost let my guards completely down. I was ready to rest, to believe and to trust myself within someone else's arms. What a fool I am! I was ready to part with my INDEPENDENT WOMAN ways and let him do what he said he would do. Truth is, I guess, I am too comfortable. Or, I was too comfortable. I now know that the time has not yet come for me to let go and truly put myself within someone else's arms. As much as I want to. I simply can not.


Today was my last at work. Well not official, but the last day is soon approaching. The only promise I have is a part time job that doesn't offer the benefits I need for my baby girl. I was okay with the fact that it may take longer than I had anticipated to find a good job worth working. Now, I am afraid. There are so many things that I want and so many things that I can't have.


My gut says that GOD will bless me and I will be able to do more than I ever dreamed. I believe GOD and all that he says. In HIM is where my faith lies. Soon I won't have to worry about the prices of pillows for my couch or the price of a nice pair of shoes for me. If I see a blouse or vase that I just love, I won't have to pass it up. And those pictures for my walls, I will have with ease. Oh, and a bed for my baby (how joyful), that would just make my heart smile if her mommy could go out and say I want the most beautiful bed for my baby. A bed that is almost as beautiful as she is. One day, GOD will bless.


One day, with all things considered, I will be happy.


For now, the plan is to get in position so that I will be ready for the blessing.